I feel i have just begun my humiliating journey
the envy isnt anger, its just pain
brings tears to my eyes, wish that i knew you
wish that i was one of you
wish that i didnt feel so all alone in a sea of talented people
all so much better than me
wish i didnt feel uncomfortable
meeting attractive people, i feel they are judging me
so i like unattractive people, I love the nonchalant subtleness
i love the look in your eyes
i love to read between the lines
you are an article in tean beat
im just a kid, i want to be street
im just a baby with big feet
Im the saddest person you will ever meet
but you wont be able to tell
I hide it really well
tell my stupid jokes, put myself down
you’ll probably see right through me
get disgusted by my lack of self worth
always playing the clown with a frown
tell myself to be to get well
judge myself, hate myself
so selfish so fucked up
i have to stop the cycle for my kid
so lost and found and afraid and stupid.
its no way to live, was i just born this way
ive heard what every friend and therapist and specialist had to say
it doesnt go away
so i just hide it everyday
live my little secret lie
dump it on some unlucky guy.

Being picked up out of a crib and held in the dark

Chance meetings are the best, forced meetings are the worst.